Because the 12-Step program is an honest program, I’m not going to lie. My efforts to stop controlling and fixing others has been a long, hard process. I have followed the steps, attended meetings, written codependent self-help articles, and still nurture self-imposed guilt when it comes to detachment. One source of wisdom and comfort comes from the Detach Not Abandon acrostic below.

Beginning with guilt. For me, guilt is a killer. It kills hope. Guilt whispers blame and shame in my ear. If I relapse and listen, guilt will blame me for what I do and shame me for what I didn’t do.

Just for today, let’s work on disengaging from the lies guilt tries to inject into every reflection. We can only keep one thought in our head at a time. Let’s make it a positive one!

“Do not be afraid, for you will not be put to shame; don’t be humiliated, for you will not be disgraced. For you will forget the shame of your youth . . . (Isaiah 54:4 HCSB).